This was what Princess Isabel wrote.
All because I told her to practice for her Ejaan test and that she was not supposed to play with the tablet since it was a school day.
She went to her room, took out a big piece of paper and wrote this. She even drew a happy face, crossed it out and replaced it with sad face. This was to show me that she thinks Mummy doesn’t love her and she was sad.
When she showed this to me, I rolled my eyes and tried to ignore her nonsense. Then she said,”I am going to keep this to remind myself in the future.” She rolled the paper up and went to take the cellophane tape. I don’t know whether I should be amused or upset. I decided that it was more amusing.
So I followed her to her room and scooped her up in my arms. I explained to her that if I did not love her, then I won’t even be bothered with her test. It would have been so much easier for me to just let her play with her tablet so that I could relax and watch tv. Then she smiled sheepishly at me and I gave her a big kiss.
I remember that I too wrote such a note when I was a little girl. I was definitely not as young as Isabel now but was around 10 or 11 years old. I still remember that my mum nagged me about something that made me very upset. I took out a piece of paper and wrote about how my mum always made me angry and that she could not make me happy for one whole day. I even wrote that I don’t want to stay at home anymore and that I want to change my name so I could be someone else.
I wasn’t as bold as Isabel so I did not show it to my mum. I threw the note away in the dustbin. Somehow, my mum found the note. She did not confront me but she hinted that she knew about it. She definitely knew about it as she even repeated some of the things that I wrote. However, she did not find my note amusing. So I just kept quiet.
I can’t believe now that I am a mum myself, I am starting to see these kind of notes. I hope that I am not going to receive any hate notes from my kids. I don’t think I will find it amusing anymore if I keep receiving these kind of notes.
And I need to let Isabel know that she has to improve her grammar. It should be ‘Mummy doesn’t love me’, not ‘don’t’. But I guess I’ll leave that for another time. Right now, I just want to cuddle next to her and remind her once again that Mummy will love her forever and ever.