When my son asked me to quickly go away

Slow down, my son. Don’t grow up too quickly

The day has come. The day which I knew would come one day. The day which I dreaded and hoped it would not come so soon. The day when my son asked me to quickly go away as he is a big boy now and doesn’t want to be seen with his mummy hanging around…..

Sure, I know that it is not a big deal. Kids grow up and they are embarrassed to be seen with their mummies hanging around. They don’t want to be hugged and kissed in public anymore. They want to be seen as a ‘big kid’.

I know that all parents will go through this day. I just wished it did not come so soon.

That day when it happened was just last Friday. Both Ethan and Isabel were attending a VBS (Vacation Bible School) programme for a week. As I registered them too late, Ethan’s class for 7 and 8-year-olds was full. So he was put into a class for 9 and 10-year-old.

I dropped them off each morning at the main hall for the singing session. I would just stand at the back of the hall to make sure they were ok. I mean, of course, I know that they would be ok. I just wanted to stand there for 10 minutes.

Ethan did not say anything about it from Monday till Thursday. On Friday, as usual, I was standing at the back of the hall when I saw him pointing to the back. I gestured to him, asking what was he pointing at. He pointed again and I looked at what he was pointing at. When I realised he was actually pointing at the door, I rolled my eyes at him. And then I tried to ignore him. I knew that he was trying to get me to look at him. When I finally did, he pointed at the door again.

Ok, fine, I thought. I walked over to him and pretended to ask him what he wanted. He said, “Mummy, go. Quickly go.” “Why?” I asked. He looked at me and said, “Just quickly go now!”

“Fine. I am going to work now.” And I left, feeling a bit hurt that I had been chased away by my son.

That was the first time that Ethan chased me away, too embarrassed to be seen with his mummy around. He would usually ask me to stay around. Not anymore.

When I picked him up in the evening, I asked him why he asked me to go away. I didn’t disturb him and I didn’t do anything that would embarrass him.

“Mummy, all my friends were looking at you. They were asking why my mummy was standing there. No one else had their mummies there,” he explained.

“So you felt embarrassed?” I wanted to know.

“Yes!” he answered.

Sigh, just standing there was embarrassing enough for my 7-year-old son. What happened to the little boy who always asked me to stay around as long as I can? The little boy who always needed his mummy? I used to tell him that I can’t stay around for long and I needed to go to work. I told him that he has to be a big boy and be brave. And now that he is, my heart missed my little boy.

It won’t be long before he ask me to just drop him at the entrance and not to get down from the car at all. It also won’t be long before he thinks he is too old to be hugged and kissed, especially in public.

For the time being, I will definitely cherish these wonderful moments when he thinks that his mummy is the most important person in the world….And I secretly hope that I will remain the most important person in his life forever….


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